Trusting Your Doctor

The first person other than themselves that parents trust their children with is their doctors.  The parents choose a pediatrician for their child sometimes before the child is even born.  They do their homework, they speak to possible pediatricians and make a choice based on mutual beliefs and respect.  They trust that this is the person who will be responsible for keeping their child healthy and growing.  The pediatrician is also the first person the parents go to for concerns and questions about their child’s health, maintenance and behavior.  Together they work to raise the perfect child, the child with the confidence to take on the world someday.

Every mom and dad await anxiously for the arrival of their child.  There are no before baby dreams in which the baby has a problem, develops issues or is not the most perfect thing that has ever graced God’s green Earth.  Unfortunately, real life does not always follow that dream.  Children are born with issues, problems, defects.  Parents can only hope and pray that if this happens, they will be ready to deal with it, so that they can make the best decisions for their child, choose the best course of treatment for whatever needs to be done.

When a child has an issue, these are the times the parents turn to their pediatrician for advice.  If the child has an issue that may require further treatment, perhaps another doctor, the parents rely on the expertise of their pediatrician.  They will take his advice and take their child to see the doctor the pediatrician has recommended.  Having a good trusting relationship with the doctor you have chosen to take care of your children makes it much easier to choose a doctor to handle your child’s special needs.  If you trust your doctor, and your doctor trusts the specialist he has recommended, then you know you can trust the specialist he has recommended, and you will develop a working and trusting relationship with that physician as well.

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Hydrate Your Child’s Brain

The brain is made up of 85% water.  This is the organ that gets dehydrated first.  Keeping the brain hydrated keeps your body functioning at its maximum capacity.  Even the slightest bit of dehydration can make your body perform at less than optimum.  As adults, we can adjust, drink more water, do more exercise.  Our children count on us to make those decisions for them.  Start with healthy water drinking habits now.  By the time the body feels thirst, your brain is already dehydrated.  The number one cause of memory loss is the fact that the brain is dehydrated.  Your body is telling you to get more water to your brain.

Healthy habits start young, we all know that to be true.  Starting your children with drinking water, and plenty of it, will keep them on the path to good health.  Keeping the brain hydrated keeps all the other organs performing at peak.  When we hear that we should drink eight to ten 8 ounce glasses of water a day, that seems like a lot of water.  However, if you had been drinking that much water since you were young, it would just be a matter of what you did every day from growing up.  Drinking more water is the start of every good diet.  Just think, if we had been drinking more water from when we were younger, we might not need that diet in the first place.

We need to instill healthier habits in our children, healthier eating, more exercise, getting more sleep, and drinking more water.  Get rid of the soda and the sugar drinks.  Put away the iced tea pitcher and stock the refrigerator with pure water.  Make it a game, time the water drinking, everybody drinks a glass of water before each meal, however you incorporate this into your children’s diet and daily regimen, the healthier they will be.  Their brains will be hydrated, waiting like the sponges they are to soak up the knowledge that today will bring.

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Patience Is Not Automatic For A Parent

Patience is a virtue.  We have all heard that.  However, whoever wrote that had probably never dealt with a difficult child.  A difficult child is not a bad child, just a challenging child, a child who needs more guidance and understanding than most.  It is easy to parent an easy going child.  They understand what you are saying to them, for the most part they follow the rules and achieve above at above average levels because the seek approval from their parents.  They are not perfect children, but children who know, or at least have learned, how to work with society.

The rebellious child offers a challenge for all of us, parents, teachers, coaches, anyone who has to deal with this child in a situation of authority.  The rebellious child is also not a bad child, just one that needs a little more guidance.  Figuring out why the child is rebellious is one way of learning how to deal with the issue.  This may just be one scared child.  Maybe the child does not have anyone in their life who believes in them, so they put up the wall right away, believing they can protect themselves from being hurt.

Parents are given a patience badge as soon as a child reaches the years in which they get to make their own choices.  Parents don’t take a class in patience.  However, a parent who musters up every bit of patience they have to deal with a child who is rebellious or challenging may just find the right way to deal with this child.  Screaming and yelling don’t work.  Communication breaks down and no one is listening to what the other has to say.

Listen, learn to listen.  Be patient, be patient when you have no patience left.  Try to guide and show, rather than dictate and demand.  You may just find that this child is saying, “Please help me grow, don’t give up on me.”

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Help for Attachment Addiction

Addiction comes in many forms. It doesn’t just exist as a substance problem, although that is one of the most common. It must be taken in consideration that addiction is about the psychological impact of a person, place, or thing, rather than the thing itself. The actual object, or the vehicle for the addiction, is irrelevant in relation to what the root cause of the addiction is, and subsequently, how it should be treated.

One addiction that often gets overlooked, but is rather prevalent, is attachment addiction. One example of this is in relationships. Many people see a relationship, especially that on a sexual or emotional level, to be sweet the more “inseparable” the two people seem to be, but in truth it’s a very dangerous situation for one person to be so attached to another person. While there is such a thing as infatuation, (which may not always an addiction) it is something that should be monitored, as once it becomes a full attachment addiction there could be serious and lasting consequences.

The issue with this kind of attachment is that it creates a certain need to be around someone. While it’s one thing to enjoy another’s company, it can lead to serious emotional breakdowns when the need isn’t met. Unlike a substance abuse, where the addict can simply obtain the substance to feed their addiction, in this case the person who is the cause of the attachment is not always available, and therefore the addict can go through serious withdraw symptoms.

The good news is that attachment issues are not new and there are plenty of places online, like Rehab-International.org, which can help deal with these difficult addictions. There are hospitals that specialize in attachment addiction and have trained professionals that know how to treat it. If you or someone you know is suffering from an attachment issue, they can get help today and start living a healthy, happy life.

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Keeping Fit With The Kids

Your kids are growing up, faster than you thought was even possible.  They are little people now, who have their own ideas about what they want.  What is wrong with eating cookies for breakfast?  Why do we have to have vegetables?  Can we put syrup on them?  Why can’t we watch the television all day long?  What if we don’t want to go out and play?  These are all things parents must deal with on a daily basis.  It is actually very easy to let the television be the babysitter.  The kids are mesmerized, it is better than the best magic show.  It is also really easy to allow a not so healthy lunch or dinner, rather than take the time to make sure the kids are eating well balanced meals.  It is a lot easier to open the cookie jar than to cut up some fruit and put it on a plate.  Our kids needs us not to take the easy way out.  They need us to guide them to do the right thing.  Maybe we need them to keep us on the straight and narrow as well.

Next time the kids want a snack, forget the cookies.  Cut up some apples and oranges, sing some fruit songs and enjoy what mother nature has given us, foods that are good and good for us.  When it is time to watch that sing along show for the twentieth time of the day, this is a good time to go for a walk.  If there is a baby involved, get the stroller out and go for a nice long walk.  You can teach small children a lot about nature during a walk.  There are falling leaves, acorns, different sticks and rocks, fresh cut grass, all things that have stories attached.

You can create a better world for your kids.  Teach them to use their imaginations instead of a remote.  Teach them to love nature, and embrace all it has to teach us.

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The Symptoms of Attachment Disorder

Attachment Disorder is a syndrome in which a child lost that all important bonding time during the early part of their life.  They did not learn to trust that someone would be there to protect them.  Without that interaction with someone they trust, they have learned, mostly out of fear, in essence to take care of themselves. This is a big burden for a small child.  There are many factors that can play a role in creating an attachment disorder.  A baby born addicted to drugs may not be able to bond with the mother or other adults, their body is in such a state of addiction. Children who suffer abuse can have attachment disorders.  Children who may be born ill, having to spend a lot of their early time in a hospital setting, instead of in their mother’s arms can have attachment disorder.

There are signs to look for if you suspect a child has an attachment disorder, and fortunately, there is help.  A child with attachment disorder does not trust those around them.  They lack self control, and do not realize there are consequences for their actions.  They can be bossy children, controlling the situation around them makes them feel safer, as their fear is that they will not be able to control things.  They can be defiant, argumentative and demanding.  They easily throw temper tantrums, and will blame their behavior on others.  They are typically under achievers, and have difficulty maintaining friendships.

There are treatment courses for Attachment Disorder, including therapy to help the child sort out their feelings and fears.  While many of the above symptoms can apply to other behavioral diagnoses, such as Opposition Defiant Disorder or ADHD, even post traumatic stress disorder, recognizing the symptoms is the first step in getting the necessary help to figure out exactly what is going on with the child, thus preparing the proper course of treatment.

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The Importance of Bonding

A mother holds up her child.

Image via Wikipedia

A baby is born.  Before he is even cleaned off he is laid on his mom’s chest.  The bond that began forming on the inside is now outside the womb.  Before a baby is five minutes old the ritual of bonding has begun.  The mother already feels the pangs of detachment when the baby is taken away to be cleaned off, weighed and measured.  The time in the hospital after birth is not only for healing for the mother physically, but a time for mother and baby to get to know one another, or to bond.  Dad and the family are a part of this as well, though their bonding will come once the baby is home and the familiar sounds and smells begin to become apparent to the new life.

The baby only knows what instinct tells him.  Instinct tells him that the mother will feed him.  She will hold him, keep him warm, comfort him, and make him feel better if he is upset or sick.  This bond begins before birth and continues throughout the life of the child and mother.  Dad comes in and his job is to protect.  The baby knows dad is strong and feels safe in his arms.  The baby gets to know how dad smells and will instinctively feel comfortable when dad holds him.

There may be brothers and sisters as well.  The baby will get to know them as well, feel safe with them, beginning the bond of family.  As the baby grows he will know that if he is unfamiliar with his surroundings he should stay near mom, dad or other family members.  If he wanders and he is afraid, he will cry and a family member will come find him.  Bonding is one of the most important parts of the parent-child relationship.  This safe feeling gives the child what he needs to grow and become everything he can be in this world, knowing he has people who love him and protect him.

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Helping Your Child Mourn the Loss of a Family Member

It’s a sad part of life, but sooner or later someone in your child’s life will pass away. Your child will be sad, confused, and will need help dealing with emotions that have never been experienced before. Together you can mourn your loss, but also cherish all the happy times you’ve shared.

Look Through Photo Albums

Old photographs bring families together, especially at a funeral. Each photograph with your deceased family member will open a flood of memories that you’ll be able to share with your child. Others around you will have their own photos and stories as well, and together you can gather all the photographs and create a photo album of their life. Help him understand that while a funeral is a sad occasion, it can also be a celebration of life.

Embrace the Happy Memories

When you share happy stories with your child, you’re telling her about all the good times spent with family and friends. The more stories she hears about your loved one, the more she’ll begin to realize that even though someone may be dead they’ll never truly be gone because they can live on forever in our hearts and our memories of them. She’ll begin to realize that sometimes a death in the family can bring it closer together.

Remember that it’s Okay to be Sad

In between sharing stories and looking through photographs, you’re going to be sad. So is your child. You just lost someone you loved very much, he needs to know that it’s okay to be sad, it’s alright to be angry, and it’s important to mourn. Take the time to sit someplace quiet with him, and help him understand why he feels so sad. If you start to cry, it’s okay to let him see you crying. Try to comfort him as best as you can, and let him know that his feelings are perfectly normal.

Filed Under: Parents, Relationships

6 Things to Pack when Dropping Your Child off for the Day

When you drop your baby or toddler off at your parents’ house for the day, you need to remember to bring along everyday things they might need. While it’s great that Grandma and Grandpa can watch over your child, they don’t have a professional daycare setup and all the things you used as a baby are probably long gone. Here are six essentials you don’t want to forget to bring in your day bag.

A Change of Clothes

Accidents happen, food gets spilled, and mud is around every outside corner. Pack a clean set of extra clothes for your child so that he doesn’t have to sit in his dirty clothes all day if he does spill something on himself.

Plenty of Diapers and Wipes

Pack two days worth of diapers and wipes, because you don’t know what’s going to happen while you’re away. If your baby gets sick you’ll want to have provided enough diapers so she can be changed frequently. Don’t forget to pack diaper cream if she has a rash.

Bottles and Milk

Bring enough bottles for the day, and pack more milk than you’ll think will be needed.

Spoons, Sippy Cups and Snacks

Toddlers are still learning how to use cups and forks, so make sure to pack eating utensils he’s comfortable with and some familiar sippy cups. Packing some favorite snacks is also a good idea and could help out your parents if they’re unsure what to feed him.

Favorite Toys

At some point your child is going to want to sit down and play, whether she’s nine months old or 18 months old. If you pack some of her favorite toys, she’ll be able to entertain herself for a while.

A Blanket or Stuffed Animal for Nap Time

Taking a nap in a strange place is difficult, but nap time can be much easier with a favorite blanket or stuffed animal to snuggle with.

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Finding Daycare for Your Child

Finding daytime care for a child can be difficult, especially if you’re not sure what your options are or if you have special needs that have to be met. There are a plethora of private daycare centers, as well as government run programs. If you happen to live near family, a grandparent or favorite aunt and uncle can be a great choice for a daycare provider.

Going to a Private Daycare

There are a variety of daycare options that are available. Do some research on what each facility offers. You’ll want to look into rates, class size, curriculum, and playground structures. Don’t overlook parent recommendations and reviews, either. If your child is in school, she can talk to her friends and find out what program they’re enrolled in and if they like it or not. You want this to be a happy experience for your child.

Asking Family to Help During the Day

Family members make great babysitters and daycare providers. Your child is already familiar with them, he knows what the rules are at their houses, and he knows it’s a place where he can have fun. You’ll want to ask a family member that has enough time and energy to watch over your kid, and also choose someone who doesn’t have any physical problems that might make it too difficult. Make sure to provide enough diapers and wipes, a change of clothes, as well as bottles and milk if needed.

Enrolling Your Child at the Community Center

If money is a problem and you don’t have available family nearby, look into daycare options at the community center. There are often programs for families with income restrictions that are available. Ask around at the local rec center or YMCA, or try going to your city government’s website for more information. You could also try looking for a program at the church or religious center you attend.

Filed Under: Parents
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