Attachment Disorder

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Attachment disorder is a sad and unfortunate truth of today. However, adults everywhere can–and have a responsibility to–address the disorder and prevent it from occuring.

Humans naturally form attachments. We make friends, we form relationships with family members, lovers, co-workers, almost everyone around us. Babies especially need relationships, so they can develop trust and attachment. When a baby cries, someone addresses its need: changing a diaper, feeding it, moving it from an uncomfortable position. However, if a baby’s need is not met, the baby continues in a state of unhappiness and rage develops instead of a trusting relationship. The baby will mature into a child without ever having formed a meaningful relationship and will distrust those around them.

Attachment disorder only develops if a child’s needs are unmet. Paying close attention to a baby is extremely important and addressing its needs is a calling that everyone shares. This of course does not mean pandering to a child all their life. By the time a child enters their second year, limits can be set; parents can say “no.” The child will accept this limit, test it, or perhaps defy it, but this is natural for the child and is part of their growing and learning.

Babies cannot do anything for themselves. For them to grow up healthy and happy, adults must do everything for them for the first years of their lives. Without this kind and loving care, attachment disorder will rear its ugly head more and more.

Babies Can Not Be Spoiled

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Many parents are concerned that they might spoil their baby or child. This can be an issue that weighs on the first time parent’s mind quite a bit. If you are a parent that is expecting your first baby, you may hear lots of advice from people who warn you not to pick her up every time she cries or else you run the risk of spoiling her. For the youngest of infants, however, this is simply untrue.

The young baby has only one mechanism with which to communicate his desires. This mechanism is crying. Although it can be difficult at first to determine why your baby is crying, it is important to comfort him and check for the most common reasons for a small baby’s unhappiness.

The most common reason for a baby to cry is hunger, followed closely by an uncomfortable diaper, the need to burp, or being too hot or cold. However, there are also many times when a baby simply wants to be held. This is understandable as the womb was a compact environment that kept her secure and safe. Using a sling, or some other type of baby carrier, will allow you to satisfy your baby’s need to be held while still leaving your hands free to take care of other children or to do chores.

Holding, as well as cuddling, your baby is a natural desire. It is one that should be acted on as often as possible since this will build the secure and attached bond between you and your baby. Your baby will come to realize that he is safe with you. This will allow him to build the confidence he needs to explore his world as he continues to grow and mature. Having a secure attachment to a primary caregiver is vital to every baby’s healthy development.

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